Dr. Damron Quotes
(Dick Damron was a mainstay among the faculty at KCU from the 1970's into the new millenium. Loved by students, Dr. Damron was well-known for, among other things, his pithy quips in his history lectures. Many of these "Damronisms" were collected by a student in the late '90's and are presented here for your pleasure and in memory of Dr. Dick Damron.)

  1.  “He went and beat the stew out of him!”
  2.  “That boy must’ve been weaned on lemon juice!”
  3.  “By jingo!”
  4.  “It was crazy...it was like a hen on a June bug”
  5.  “The railroads started springing up like crab grass!”
  6.  “Stock watering turned into a big rat’s nest!”
  7.  “Now Andrew Johnson had as much business being president as Frances the talking mule!”
  8.  “She was up to her ears in alligators!”
  9.  “Like a squatting heifer!”
10. “It was like four sheets in the wind!”
11. “Most people thought William Jennings Bryan was a little left of center....a taco short of a combo lunch!”
12. “Now William Jennings Bryan had as much business being Secretary of State as Bullwinkle Moose!”
13. “Now England was mad because the U.S. was over here playing in everybody's sandbox!”
14. “The reason Castro didn’t try to take over the naval base was because if he did...he knew we’d thump his gourde!”
15. “Now George Dewey wasn’t exactly the top banana on the stalk!”
16. “The Philippines were like a pitcher of warm spit!”
17. “Some people thought Teddy was nuttier than a Christmas fruitcake!”
18. “He was wilder than a large hare!”
19. “Teddy had the temper of an alligator!”
20. “The Republican party was so strong they could have nominated Frances the talking mule and he would’ve won!”
21. “Finally, Germany realized they were graveyard dead!”
22. “Hitler went through Poland like a hot knife through butter!”
23. “It seemed like whenever we fought the Japanese we ate their lunch and popped their sack!”
24. “Japan kept havin' to change horses in the middle of the river!”
25. “We finally pinned Hitler’s ears to the wall!”
26. “He ran away like a banny rooster!”
27. “Loberslabovia!”
28. “Strom Thurmond is so old they probably got somebody behind him with a stick movin' his mouth!”
29. “That’s why we’re over there bombing the stew out of Yugoslavia!”
30. “Harry Truman had the personality of a noodle!”
31. “Russia got mad, took their ball and went home!”
32. “Nobody could believe that little haberdasher from Missouri fired Douglas McArthur!”
33. “He was like a crippled snail!”
34. “It was like runnin' over a water buffalo!”
35. “There were little people runnin' around in pajamas!”
36. “He was a little man about the size of a bar of soap!”
37. “Now what in the wide world of sports are we gonna do about it!”
38. “I hate people with hair!”
39. “Next thing we knew they put up a dog!”
40. “Next thing we knew Cuba went and jumped in bed with Russia!”